Supporting Families. Supporting Children.
Being a grandparent is often one of the most fulfilling roles that one can experience in a lifetime. But sometimes the unimaginable happens, and life changes dramatically.
Such was the case for Linda, whose three grandchildren had become the light of her life. But the joy that they brought her was overshadowed by the addiction to opioids that plagued her daughter, Ashley, and her son-in-law Brett. Despite Linda’s repeated offers of help and Ashley’s and Brett’s promises to stop, the addiction had taken control of their lives. Jake, their oldest child of the three, had witnessed his mother being rescued from an overdose and because of their continued use, had taken on the role of caregiver for his two pre-school-aged siblings AND his parents. Linda was constantly on edge, worrying about her children and grandchildren.
Brett’s sudden death from an overdose left the family reeling and even more devastated. Ashley made the decision to start her own recovery process and entered a sober living home. Linda stepped forward to take custody of the three children. FrontLine Service immediately contacted Linda to offer support for her and the kids through the agency’s Supporting Children-Trauma Systems Therapy (TST) program. The TST program works with all child systems (home, school, community), recognizing that without support and intervention, traumatic experiences in childhood often lead to severe emotional and behavioral dysregulation – irritability, shutting down, inattention, withdrawal, and self-harm.
FrontLine’s TST team worked with both Linda and Ashley. Because Jake has significant social-emotional challenges and was experiencing bullying in school, the TST team reached out to Jake’s teachers, school counselor, and principal and developed a plan to help them better communicate with Jake and build resilience. At the same time, FrontLine was working extensively with Linda, coaching her on how to help Jake in his school environment, assist him in coping with his grief, and adjusting to no longer having to be the family caregiver. This was difficult for Jake, as it was a role he had played from a very young age.
Ashley successfully completed her in-house treatment and remained focused on rebuilding her relationship with her three children. Linda was elated when Ashley’s request to regain custody of her children was approved, and Ashley was able to return to Linda’s home where the children were living. FrontLine’s TST team continued to provide intensive services at every step of their recovery. And while there were still challenges for Linda, she and Ashley navigated parenting roles with a focus on agreeing on decisions which involved Jake and his siblings.
Jake had even attended FrontLine’s Camp Bridges – a day to spend with other children who had lost a parent to homicide, suicide or overdose. Family stability seemed to be within reach.
As is often the case with addiction, returning to drug-use is a life-long challenge. And a challenge that Ashley was ultimately unable to overcome. One morning, Linda found Ashley unresponsive and unable to be revived. The three children had lost their remaining parent to a drug overdose; Linda had lost her daughter and son-in-law to addiction.
And she was now terrified that her grandchildren’s lives would completely fall apart. Because of the extensive work that the TST team had been doing with the family and the school, immediate support and services were provided to this family, so devastated by loss.
The TST team worked with Linda every step of the way to obtain permanent custody of her grandchildren. The team has provided a safe place for Linda to express her own extensive grief at the loss of her daughter, the loss of simply being able to be a ‘Grandma’ and the guilt that she feels about what the children have experienced in their young lives. She is making remarkable progress, given the extent of the responsibilities that she now carries.
She smiles when she talks about bringing her grandchildren to FrontLine’s annual Twinkle Shop holiday party, excited that they will have a place to simply be kids, shop for holiday gifts (donated by generous supporters) and enjoy the wonder of the Huntington Bank Field, home of the Cleveland Brown’s. Linda is not shy about saying that FrontLine has been her lifeline and has helped her to develop her own resilience in the face of immense loss, and navigate the community supports she will need to raise her grandchildren.